And, I love the season's color scheme -- beautiful plums, vibrant purples, rich violets, coupled with tried and true black. Gone are the days of wild 80s-hued fuchsias, gaudy pinks and mind-numbing shades of yellow and orange. The fall calls for a more staid palette add to that the fact that plaids are making an extraordinary comeback and you have a season where anyone can look great. Well, almost anyone and here comes my rant.
Why is it that certain people see things that everyone else knows good and daggone well do not go together UNDER any circumstances and throw it on? I know that it is not because they do not care, therefore, I am writing this rant under the assumption that they just do not know any better. For instance, this morning, I parked my car in my regular parking garage and expected to see my regular sights on the way to the office. However, today was anything other than ordinary. I saw two women walking together and they were a sight that would make any fashionistas eyes water. Heck, I heard old blind Lazarus from the Old Testament hollering about how their tackiness made him want to lose his sight again.
Anyway, the shorter of these two women had on a blue and black plaid wool jacket (which on its own was cute with its asymmetrical lines), some hot pink biker shorts, red slide-ons, with striped socks and a multi-hued flowered top (that had the nerve not to have a SINGLE SPOT of pink in it, the shades it sported were brown, cocoa, cinnamon, cream). Her friend had on a Washington, DC baseball cap, yellow capris that turned up at the bottom to reveal some sort of patterned cuff, some type of paisley tank top, black hi-heeled wedges and a fake Louis Vuitton scarf. Each outfit was replete with a large bag and one actually had on a black fanny pack in addition to the oversized purses. In all honesty, I could not tell you a daggone thing about those purses except that they seemed big. I was so focused on what they were wearing that I just could not get it together...it was akin to visual stimuli overload. My eyes began to water and my mouth became dry. I was saddened and a little lost. I could not understand why someone would commit so many fashion sins in a single day, in a single outfit.
In the end, all I could do was channel Florida Evans from Good Times in that episode where her husband James died, and say "DAYUM, DAYUM, DAYUM!!!!"
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